There are those pivotal talk that you had with your mother or father when you were a kid, and somehow they made it seem so easy! Actually, that’s not even remotely true. The vast majority of “those talks” are clumsy at best, and usually far more is not said than actually muttered out loud. That being said, my dad has historically done a very good job. Whether it’s about girls or grades, and now that I’m older, women and career, my father has never failed to offer eloquent advice in a non-threatening and not embarrassing tone. I’ll never forget my first “birds and the bees” talk with him. He asked me if I wanted to take a drive in his old sports car. It was a 1989 Nissan 300ZX, so obviously I said yes. I mean, what junior high school student doesn’t want to go cruising down the boulevard in a miniature rocket ship? When we hit the open road, the conversation began, and I could tell that he was just a hair nervous.
He was completely honest with me, and didn’t treat any of the subject matter as though it were anything to be ashamed of or to avoid talking about. That, along with the fact that I was already happily in the shotgun seat of his car, made the afternoon a delight and the conversation a complete success.
The key to bringing up the important stuff with your kids is to respect them and to treat them like adults. I’ve noticed that people often act the way others treat them, so do yourself a favor, and treat your kids the way you’d want to be treated. Like an adult. Another great tip is to do something that they enjoy. It’s nice to have a bit of a buffer between the serious context of the conversation and the fact that you’re having the conversation at all. My dad knows me well, that’s why he chose for us to go for a long drive. It might also be a good idea to throw the ball around or go for a hike. Activities such as these offer needed respite for processing.
Taking a test drive with your son or daughter will offer the best of all worlds. The gravity of your conversation will be diluted in the excitement of getting behind the wheel of a new, unfamiliar, but awesome car. If you’re in the market for a new car, I highly recommend getting online and going to either Puente Hills Nissan or www.downtownnissan.com to find what you’re looking for. It doesn’t matter if you buy the car, but if you end up cruising around in a new Nissan, the chances are excellent that you will. Good luck with your important discussion, and remember, honesty and fun make all of the hardest discussions with your kids, productive.